Unlike Undergraduate Scandal, 'MBA Admissions a Complete Meritocracy,' Says Student Whose Family Donated $10 Million

NEW YORK, NY - As the world of higher education reels from the indictments of actresses and millionaires in bribing undergraduate admissions departments, those in top business school can rest assured that their path to elite institutions was solely based on their accomplishments, says David Mendelson, a student a Columbia Business School whose family donated $10 million to the institution.

Mendelson, 23, a first-year MBA candidate and grandson of Heico chairman Larry Mendelson, told Boredroom News that, “it’s shameful that these LA-types would so underhandedly bribe their way into college across the country [and] undermine the integrity of the system. I’m glad that the Masters in Business Administration community is a complete meritocracy and considers only aptitude and work experience in the selection process.” Mr. Mendelson’s work experience consists exclusively of summer internships, as the entered the graduate business program directly after graduating from Columbia College; the average full-time work experience of his classmates is five years and the CBS admissions application states that a minimum of two years is required.

“My grandfather worked pretty hard make over-priced airplane parts,” explains Mendelson, “It really does seem like only people who can’t afford to pay enough the right way are the ones bribing the help, and that’s just not cool for anyone.”